“Be severe to yourself and severe to others. Suppress the sentiments of relationship, friendship, love, and gratitude. Have only one pleasure, one joy, one reward — the triumph of the revolution. Night and day, have only one thought, the destruction of everything without pity. Be ready to die and ready to kill any one who opposes the triumph of your revolt.” Michael Bakunin (1814-76)
Nihilism in Russia had true adherents only among students of the universities and higher schools, and among the middle classes. The peasants and workmen did not understand its ideals of destruction and of social revolution.It would seem,from this that the less education you have the better off you are.The peasants with little access to schools did not believe the razzmatazz,but the intellectuals believed in the message.It’s lucky the peasants were in the majority.
Most people who read the above monologue are going to think that this must have been written by a madman,but if you believe that you live in a society that is so corrupt,that has been so degraded,you may think that the only way to save the village is to burn it down.The uneducated peasants were at the bottom of the barrel,they were hungry, overworked,in pain and tired.They were not ready to go any further down that road,so they rejected it and probably went off to church and prayed which in this particular case may have been the lesser of the two evils.
Everyone has a new idea to sell and generally it is about believing in something.
Lately it seems to be about believing in yourself,whether it is The Secret,or Consuelo Mack,or Dr John Demartini,it all seems to be about gaining self control by believing in yourself and it is presented as the latest snake oil treatment.Like all religions,it only works if you believe in it.You must have faith in order to join the latest pyramid scheme or cult,and a desire to find the answer,to find god or that pot of gold.
Most people would say that they believe in education,and more people can read and write than at any time in history.In that case all those who believe in education would therefore believe that the world we live in is a better place than at any other time in history.If the first thing you or your child does,when going to school is recite the pledge of allegiance,or say a prayer,you are not being educated,if there are no extensive arts and music classes,then you are not being educated, you,or your child are being programmed.
Many people belong to some kind of religion.Organized religions with their sacred books,their dogmas,their hierarchies and rituals offer a false solution.All organized beliefs are based on separation,though they may preach brotherhood. When you quote the Bhagavad Gita or the Bible,you are merely repeating and that is a lie because the truth cannot be repeated.A lie can be propounded but not truth,so sacred books are unimportant.It is through self-knowledge,not belief in an other’s symbols that one finds truth,the same goes for nationalism or patriotism.
“My country!” “My religion!” “My flag!” are just cries of stupidity.
A couple of years ago my nephew presented me with a new idea.It was very simple.He got us all into a room drew the curtains,put cushions on the floor lit some candles and some incense,put on some music and explained that he had this formula that would completely change the way we perceived life.I was a little hesitant, but I wanted to see where this ride would take me, so holding the pipe in my hand I took a long draw.I sucked that smoke deep into my lungs and instantly,I was in another world,it was strangely familiar but deeply disturbing.My eyes were closed but I saw vivid patterns,I was gripped by a sense of panic that was unspeakable,I was caught in,what I can only describe as a spiral of meaningless hypocrisy.I felt myself spinning around into the center of the spiral where I was an empty dot,with a feeling of intense dread that I was locked for eternity in this state, floating in space completely alone.I was held in this state,for maybe about 10 minutes,I was terrified, not of death but eternal life.Suddenly,the spiral broke and I was released,I opened my eyes and I was in the room.My nephew stood by the door watching me.I was now overwhelmed by a combination of euphoria and relief.I leaped to my feet and rushed over to my nephew hugging him and exclaiming how much I loved him and now I got it,I understood,I knew the answer,it was so clear.After a moment I felt exhausted so I lay down on the cushions and gazed at the ceiling.For the next few hours I drifted in and out of euphoria and panic,at one moment unsure whether I was alive or dead.Looking at a digital clock I decided that if the time changed I was alive and if it did not then I was dead.I waited for what seemed like much longer than a minute and was relieved to see the time change.I remained in a state of shock for about a week and was unable to sleep,but slowly life swung back to normal.The problem was that I could not remember what this great manifestation was,it was just like a dream that faded away. I took this drug 5-MeODMT again twice to see it I could hold onto this vision.I could not,just as it happened the first time the divination slipped away no matter how hard I tried to hold onto this divine revelation.Even though this was a terrifying journey I am glad I visited this strange familiar place,I was jolted into another existence that is there,but it is only inside my head.My imagination created all the panic, the fears,the euphoric exclamation.If I start to perceive that I have gone further than that then I might as well solicit the help of the gods.The best I have done , in the words of Jim Morrison is,”Break on through to the other Side,”but the other side of what?We like to imagine there is something for us at the end,that we will get rich and then we will have everlasting life.For what reason would anyone want everlasting life?I read once that during an orgasm there is a split second when you are in the presence of god,well that might be nice for a couple of days or weeks but then what?The only belief that interests me, is the belief in nothing,myself,my ego, included.Of course this is impossible,since nothing is still something,so you just keep shoveling the ideas out,they keep on coming at you because someone always has a new answer,a new idea,a new theory.So you take it in you inspect it and then just as you are beginning to like the idea,you toss it out.It reminds me of that song,God, by John Lennon when he expressed his disbelief in everything and he goes through the list of stuff he does not believe in but in the end he has to break down and believe in something.I think it was himself or Yoko or something banal like that.He was close and perhaps if he had lived a little longer he could have arrived at a more complete state of nihilism.

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